ARTICLE UPDATE: HOW LONG SHOULD A COURTSHIP LAST?


HOW LONG SHOULD A COURTSHIP LAST?

Courtship starts when a MATURED SINGLE MAN after a STRONG CONVICTION from GOD that a single lady is meant to be his wife decides to PROPOSE his INTENTION OF MARRIAGE to the lady and the MATURED SINGLE LADY also decides to ACCEPT his PROPOSAL after a STRONG CONVICTION from GOD that the man is meant to be her husband. 

There are seven areas of preparation that every wise single person should put in place before going into a relationship or marriage. 

*Spiritual Preparation

*Physical Preparation

*Financial Preparation

*Emotional Preparation

*Mental Preparation

*Social Preparation and

*Moral Preparation

Once you are ready to go into a relationship, you Should Not Operate Your Relationship As A Secret Cult. Your Pastor Or Your Mentor Should Know About Your Relationship. Both Parents Must Also Bless The Courtship. Courtship Should Not Be A Secret Affair If You Don't Have A Hidden Agenda! If Your Partner Says You Must Not Tell Your Pastors, Mentors Or Parents About Your Courtship, There Is Fire On The Mountain.

If You Are Not Matured Enough To Go Into An Open Courtship, Then Don't Go Into It! Avoid A Secret Courtship!

Courtship Should Not Be Less Than 6 Months and More Than 2 years Except Where There Is Parental Objection Or Financial Challenge!

Marriage is not what you rush into. Courtship Should Not Be Less Than 6 Months before you tie the knot. 

Courtship is a period of serious discussion, assessment, learning, openness and pre-marital counselling. It is a period of knowing one another more intimately.

Scripturally, no time is specified. But based on counseling and personal experience, I advised that no courtship should be less than 6 months and more than two years except where there is sickness, parental objection or financial challenge.

If it is less than 6 months, there is a danger of not knowing each other at all before the wedding. 

It is extremely dangerous to marry somebody you do not really know even if he says he is an  apostle or she is a world evangelist. Do yourself and your destiny a favor by not getting married in darkness. People can pretend to be what they are not but if you are patient and prayerful, you will discover so many things about them. 

Also, courtship should not be too long. 

If courtship is too long, it can lead to sexual immorality because of too much exposure to each other, or it can be boring and if care is not taken it can lead to a broken relationship.

If you court for only a month or less, then, you will need God’s special grace in your marriage because knowing each other will last almost a lifetime. While learning about each other takes time, you are better off when you know quite a lot about someone. 

Although, it is not how long but how well.

I know of people who have gotten married very quickly (like in a matter of days) and are still married decades later—and people who did the same thing and were divorced just as quickly. Or, a couple may be “in a relationship” for a decade, finally get married, and then split up in the first year.

It really depends on the people involved, the reasons why they get married when they do and their preparation for a godly marriage.

Singles should spend more time in prayers for the right person for them, and give their time also to godly marital seminars, marriage books and counseling. 

Similarly, singles in courtship should pray, fast and gather more knowledge from the Word, concerning His promises and commandments needed for a successful family life.

You will not miss it in marriage in Jesus name. 

Thanks for taking the ride.

©️ Pst Samuel Olagbenjo

Copied and re-edited

✍️Faith Agi

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